Loved Letter: You Win By Failing

Hi There.

You’ve hit rock bottom.

I know the feeling. I know how hopeless and scary and shameful that can feel.

You feel like a failure, like you’re down on your luck and no one truly cares.

You have no money in your bank account and bills are due soon.

Your friends have left you and you’re so confused. You’re heartbroken. You’re pissed off.

What if I told you that there is beauty in hitting rock bottom?

The thing is, what you’ve feared the most, has already happened.

We spend so much of our lives in the bondage of fear, trying our hardest to avoid hitting rock bottom. We carefully make decisions, have a (few) back up plan(s) to our back up plans. 

We’re so afraid of failing… and it makes sense.

None of us want to get our feelings hurt. No one wants to be embarrassed when friends and family ask us about that project we started, that move we committed to, that dream we’ve been chasing.

No one wants to believe that our wildest dreams are unrealistic and plans to achieve them don’t work.

It’s heartbreaking on so many levels.

But guess what, you have hit rock bottom and that means you have the option of being free.

You are in the exact place that so many people are afraid of being— that you are afraid of being.

What if, instead of curling up into a ball and berating yourself, you look around at all of the opportunity you have around you?

As I said before, living in fear is bondage. There is no freedom in not taking risks for the sake of keeping up appearances or protecting your ego.

You avoid chasing curiosity, you avoid making any significant changes, you fear trying a new dish at lunch, you don’t do anything remotely risky… and that, my love, is not a life worth living.

The thing is that even though you think you “failed”, you actually won.

You took the risk, and that’s more than what many can say. 

You got punched in the face which means you actually stepped into the ring.

You hit rock bottom and that means you actually took the leap, while others were watching from the sidelines of their own lives.

Don’t you realize how amazing you are?

Can’t you see it?

Won’t you choose to see it?

Those naysayers. The ones that you fear judging you. The ones you were trying to prove wrong… they are safely and snugly seated in the stands. They are surrounded by all of their comforts, even if it’s killing them.

They have convinced themselves that they are happy, when in actuality they are not. They too had a dream and decided to play it safe. And now that they see you chasing yours, they either fear for you or are jealous of you chasing the freedom they could have if they only tried.

Those who don’t chase their dreams, end up criticizing those who do.

There is nothing wrong with you. It is them that has the problem.

You should not base your life, life’s work and your dream on someone else who refused to go for their own.

There is nothing wrong with “failing”, loved one.

Failing is a time for learning, not sulking...

Growing, not shrinking...

Taking more risks, not playing it safe...

My advice to you?

Keep going. Keep failing.

The more times you fail, the closer you get to winning.

The more you keep sharing, doing, curating, going, the more chances you have at getting to where you want to go.

10 No’s to 1 Wins.

1000 No’s to 100 Wins.

God is so proud of you.

Congratulations on your failure, Dear. You’re that much stronger, that much wiser, that much more experienced and that much closer to you win.

This IS a win.

I celebrate you.

With So Much Love,

Alecia Renece